A couple of weeks ago, the Mutual of Omaha “Aha Moment” truck came through town. It was parked in front of my favorite bakery, but at 7:30 in the morning, nothing was happening. My Aha! moment came a few years ago, and unlike other moments that I thought were Aha! moments, this one really was. I decided I was not going to argue with my mother again. Ever. And suddenly, life on that front became so much easier. What did it mean? My mother is 81; if she doesn’t know by now what my stance is on x, y, or z, she is never going to know. And quite simply, it doesn’t matter that she doesn’t know — my fundamental relationship with her will not change. Helen Hull (unjustly neglected writer) put it wonderfully in her 1932 novel Heat Lightning:
She meets him where he stands, not where she is, herself. She doesn’t care about justifying herself to him . . . . When Geoffrey yells at me, I holler back. Always. But why should I do all the work? I want Geoffrey to know where I am. Maybe you can’t both know, at once, can’t both see what’s pinching the other into such unreasonableness.
I am working on doing the same thing with DH. It is a lot harder, no doubt about it; it’s because I am, of course, always right. And I want him to know it!
Week 9 Recipes: baked squash blossoms stuffed with herbed ricotta; cucumber salad; curried quinoa with squash, scapes, and toasted pine nuts; glazed hakurei turnips with turnip greens; roasted carrots, onions, green beans, and scallions
CSA Week 10: squash blossoms, harkurei turnips (last of the season!), strawberries, rainbow chard, carrots, summer squash, Walla Walla sweet onion, eggs
Week 10 Recipes: baked squash blossoms stuffed with herbed ricotta (because they were so good last week!); sausage, apple, and sage quiche; roasted carrots; cous cous with squash/eggplant/scapes/pine nuts/raisins; glazed hakurei turnips with turnip greens; chard and new potato curry, recipe from River Cottage Veg: 200 inspired vegetable recipes, by Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall (note to self: next time, feel free to leave some jalapeño seeds in the mix!)